Four Separation Reliefs a Divorce Lawyer Offers When a Long-lasting Marriage Inexplicably Ends
Until now, the conversations and plans and hopes have always been about a shared future. The greater good has ruled decisions. Our lives have revolved around partnerships and collaborative thinking and sharing.
Divorce, when it rears its head, doesn't sync with our existing paradigm. Dividing instead of combining? Separating instead of merging? The problems we must solve, the situations we must confront are not issues we're equipped or ready to handle. And yet....
It's a paradox rarely confronted. We need a long term solution to a short term problem. That is, we're in immediate emotional and familial crisis, but the decisions and critical thinking necessary to resolve the crisis will have repercussions and ramifications that reach years and contexts beyond what we can imagine in our current crisis mode.
We need help. We need tools. Especially in an official and legal capacity. Foreign arbitration, uncomfortable mediation, the potential foreboding court rooms can be mitigated. At this most vulnerable time, we need a trusted, knowledgeable stand-in. While we deal with the internal battles and soothe the invisible heart strains, a compassionate, understanding divorce lawyer can lead in the critical, unfamiliar arenas ahead.
Four trappings we may not even see, much less feel qualified to avoid, are areas a divorce attorney can and will navigate expertly on our behalf.
Separating urgent from important - In this chaotic time, you're confronted with daily fires to extinguish. From different housing and new phone plans to unexpected meetings and shopping lists with different necessities from stores you've never visited. It's so easy to get lost in the overwhelming forest of right now to-do lists. Not only can your attorney help sift through and prioritize the consuming embers, that legal eagle perspective will keep always in its sights the over-reaching security issues and big picture outcomes that you might otherwise be too exhausted to process.
Separating justice from law - In the sticky world leading to divorce, morality beliefs might have been shattered. Integrity and honesty may have been compromised. It only seems fair that some kind of compensation is due for wrongs suffered. Yet the laws and statutes might not come close to addressing the 'real' reasons your marriage is dissolving. Your attorney has long studied your rights and possible compensations. You don't get to re-write the codes because of your particular situation, but you do get to have someone well versed in the permissible. You get advice on legally appropriate actions that can be implemented. Let the person shouldering the legalities sort the best possible redress within the limits of the law.
Separating mine and yours from ours - Who gets the couch or even the timeshare property may seem trivial. The argument over the heirloom necklace or garden statue could well feel inconsequential. On the other hand, fear might fuel disproportionate greed or hoarding. A forgotten safety deposit box might hold keys or bonds or deeds unknown. The mortgage payment and boat loan debt could be too staggering to even confront. Instead of sinking in a quagmire of things, let a practiced hand help guide the balancing act. A calm, objective eye well versed in settling property issues is another benefit your legal advisor offers.
Separating immediate from long term - Yes, you need liquid funds to pay this month's electricity bill. Yes, you need a safe vehicle to get from here to there. But how much life insurance or pension penalties are those immediate needs worth? How does dividing the value of a retirement fund work if nobody's retiring? How are you even supposed to file taxes now? Those sorts of suffocating issues are often impenetrable because most of us don't even know the questions to ask, much less the best answers. It's part of the reason your counsel spent all that time in law school. Take advantage of it.
Knowing a capable expert is at the helm of our technical and societal separation woes, provides an essential safety net so that we can better address the deeply personal more intimate value choices and decisions that sometimes get lost in the torrents of divorce. Contact us and let a professional relieve the burdens in our area of expertise so you can better renew and begin the new life journeys that you'll be better prepared to enjoy as a result.